Fourth's the Best

After helping out with Sunday school and taking a long nap, I went out with my friends Matt, Taylor, Cristen, Ashley and Liz. We waited out a monsterous storm out a local park and as we left I told Taylor something I'd only just admitted to myself: I am incredibly hot for Matt. She advised not to try anything thing yet, since he just got out of a (however short) relationship. Just because friends give great advice doesn't mean I'm likely to follow through with it.
So when Matt and I are sitting on Ashley's living room couch later we end up fooling around under a tacky leopard-print. Our company was none the wiser, intrigued (and a little turned on) by Mrs. Jolie-Pitt's portrayal of a sodium-rich Russian spy.
Afterward Liz was incredibly shady and secretive, going off to whisper things to one or two people outside. I felt like I was doing a walk of shamelessness. Yeah, so I engaged in mutual groping on a friend's couch, who the eff hasn't? Later, everyone else was inside the appartment when Matt spun me around by the arm and kissed me. My surprise may have affected my kissing ability, but he didn't seem to mind. I feel so comfortable around him and that is a new feeling for me. We have known each other since our private school junior high days; there are few people I trust more. He knows all of the ugly details of that year but still he stays around me, a constant I won't soon let go.
As Matt left I grabbed his ass out of everyone's view. He turned back soon (forgot his keys, what a dork) and on his second trip to his car, he returned the grab. He gets my humor; I am shocked I never thought of being with him before now. In my defense, he was a man's man until recently. Oddly enough, when I promised myself that I would not be a virgin into my third decade, I imagined losing it to him.
We have made plans to hang out after he gets out of school tomorrow (he's not that much younger than me). I may break out the sexy lingerie for this. I guess we will find out tomorrow... :D

Relax People, I'm back.

Three long years and one BFF later, I am still alive. I'm in college now and I am a volunteer deejay at an awesome student run radio station and (fingers crossed) close to dating a fellow deejay.

Yes, the crazed fan!girl has grown up (and shrunk, more on that later), but I am still writing, but +gasp+ I have changed fandoms. It happens and I'm really glad it did. It's hard to write fanfiction for a show long past its prime and virtually off air.

Thanks to my friend Katy, who forced me to watch Supernatural ("C'mon, one episode won't kill you. Believe me, I'm doing you a ginormo favor!"). As you can imagine, she was right and I've cranked out a few fics [one I tried to use for GSA (don't do it, they're fanfic haters)] that I have varying pride in and I post them on my livejournal page (yes, it also just won't die).

So much has happened in the last three years, so I'll just give you the bare (tehe) minimum:

• As recently as this January I am BFFless and loving it. My former platonic wifey spent more time criticizing my every move than actually appreciating the awesomeness of moi. (Sounds flippant now, but I've spent everyday since then getting over our 5 year long distance domestic friendship.) Looking back I think we were what the other needed for that transitional time in our lives and only held on to our treadbare relationship out of obligation (me) and self-gratification (her). I was an available punching bag with low selfesteem and she was the boxer that beats that bag long past her hands are bleeding. Sure, I was at fault for a few things, but I'll leave you to decide by reading her account [if I can every find or read it (without my brain exploding from sheer overload of bullshit)].
• After a long fight, Belle (my darling canine companion through the dark days of depression and healing) lost her battle with cancer. In January of 2009, the cancer was so terrible she couldn't even walk. We let her sleep one day after a long drive through the country. She was comforting us to the end, despite her unbearable pain. I still regret everyday that I didn't play with her or just pet her. Though I know I could not have stopped the cancer, I still blame myself at times for not noticing her limp sooner. I know now that she is happier where she is and is comforting all of those other loved ones who have left for their eternal home.
• One long and sad month after Belle died, Mom and I were feeling the loneliness she had left in her absence. We decided, to my dad's short lived chagrin, that we needed another dog. We found Malcolm within an hour of the shelter's submission. The Cockapoo is now a furryhyperloud welcome addition to my growing family
• Growing? My sister and her husband descovered she was pregnant around the time Marz and I parted ways. They immediately decided, to the relief of my parents, to marry and raise the child with all the love and support their crazy hearts could muster. Tomorrow my mom will help them in their continued search for a duplex big and clean enough for the three of them. Since the news was spoken, Katie has been so mature, and level-headed but most of all happy. After several heartbreaks and set backs, she found the love of her life and is building a great life with him. I cannot wait to tell Miranda LaSha Lewellen of her mother's notorious wild days and how a tiny baby bean helped her turn her life around. Miranda will be here in late September, hopefully before Katie's 22nd birthday
• On an incredibly personal note (perks of writing under a pseudonym), I have come closer to baby making myself (process of, not intent to). Yes, one crazy Thanksgiving eve I snuck into my first gay bar, attended my first drag show, and went to second base. After years of swearing I'd never +insert sexual act here+ with someone I wasn't dating or in love with, my libido got the best of me and stuff happened. First the happening occurred with *Alan, my cousin's friend who convinced her he took my virginity (psht, wishful thinking doth not truth make) then with RA *Lance, the manslut of *Tower Dorm. It was one of those situations in which I really liked him until I got to know him, then I wish I didn't. Now he is at basic training somewhere in NJ, and I am left with his other hookups glaring and generally disliking me for the sheer fact that we sucked the same Popsicle. At one point, I had a conversation whilst standing in line for pasta with fellow deejay, *Hallie. We discussed our frustrations concerning our respective (not respectable) males, who unknowningly was not plural. Yes +gasp+ she sucked said Popsicle, too. This makes me think of the sex partner web Alice made on The L Word (which I just started watching with my lesbian friends). Let's just say the dude's a hub in a beyond gross way. There was another hookup that I won't talk about because I am grossed out by the memory and will deny it to my end.
• I mentioned earlier that I shrunk: a medication (makes me sound nuts, but that's what it's called) caused me to gain weight like a Calteen bar (props for those who know wtf I'm speaking of). I lost about half of what I'd gained within months, but have recently dropped more. I can actually hook my bra on the first clasp now! Small victory, but I'm proud nonetheless.
• College makes my high school experience look like that the hell it was. I love it here at my university, just not the 3 hour (2 hour, with my driving) distance from home and Malcolm.